{"id":116107,"date":"2026-09-19T17:03:35","date_gmt":"2026-09-19T21:03:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/?p=116107"},"modified":"2026-09-19T17:03:35","modified_gmt":"2026-09-19T21:03:35","slug":"what-does-the-bible-say-about-bitterness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/bible-resources\/bible-answers\/what-does-the-bible-say-about-bitterness\/","title":{"rendered":"What Does the Bible Say About Bitterness? Naomi Renamed Herself Bitter. The Book Never Used It."},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='booster-block booster-read-block'>\n                <div class=\"twp-read-time\">\n                \t<i class=\"booster-icon twp-clock\"><\/i> <span>Read Time:<\/span>11 Minute, 49 Second                <\/div>\n\n            <\/div><p>Some people carry one sentence around for years.<\/p>\n\n<p><em>&#8220;After what happened, I&#8217;m just not that person anymore.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n\n<p>Maybe it was a divorce. A death. A friend who turned on you. A job you gave your life to that let you go in one short meeting. At first the hurt is fresh. Then, slowly, it stops feeling like something that happened to you. It starts to feel like who you are.<\/p>\n\n<p>If you have ever asked <strong>what does the Bible say about bitterness<\/strong>, there is a woman in the Old Testament who got there before you. She did not just feel bitter. She asked her whole town to change her name to it.<\/p>\n\n<p>And the Bible&#8217;s answer to her is one of the quietest, kindest things in all of scripture.<\/p>\n\n<h2>What Does the Bible Say About Bitterness? Start With Naomi<\/h2>\n\n<p>The Book of Ruth opens with loss piled on loss. There is a famine in Bethlehem, so a man named Elimelech takes his wife Naomi and their two sons to the country of Moab. Then, in a few short verses, Elimelech dies. The two sons marry, and then they die too.<\/p>\n\n<p>The Bible says it in one flat line: &#8220;the woman was left of her two sons and her husband&#8221; (Ruth 1:5).<\/p>\n\n<p>About ten years after she left, Naomi walks home. Only one person comes with her: Ruth, her daughter-in-law from Moab, who refused to leave her. When they reach Bethlehem, the whole town comes out. The women look at this tired, older widow and ask, &#8220;Is this Naomi?&#8221; (Ruth 1:19).<\/p>\n\n<p>Here is what she says back:<\/p>\n\n<blockquote><p>&#8220;Call me not Naomi, call me Mara: for the Almighty hath dealt very bitterly with me. I went out full, and the LORD hath brought me home again empty: why then call ye me Naomi, seeing the LORD hath testified against me, and the Almighty hath afflicted me?&#8221; (Ruth 1:20-21, KJV)<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n<p>The name Naomi means something like &#8220;pleasant.&#8221; Mara means &#8220;bitter.&#8221; She is not whispering a prayer in private. She is standing in front of her neighbours, saying: <em>Don&#8217;t call me by my old name. That woman is gone. Call me what happened to me.<\/em><\/p>\n\n<p>Notice something. Nobody in the story tells her off. No one says, &#8220;Don&#8217;t talk about God like that.&#8221; The Bible writes her words down in full, unedited, and lets them stand. Her pain is taken seriously.<\/p>\n\n<div class=\"convertkit-form wp-block-convertkit-form\" style=\"\"><script async data-uid=\"6491fb8269\" src=\"https:\/\/bgodinspired.kit.com\/6491fb8269\/index.js\" data-jetpack-boost=\"ignore\" data-no-defer=\"1\" data-no-optimize=\"1\" nowprocket><\/script><\/div>\n\n\n<h2>The Name the Bible Refused to Use<\/h2>\n\n<p>Now read the very next verse. Ruth 1:22:<\/p>\n\n<blockquote><p>&#8220;So Naomi returned, and Ruth the Moabitess, her daughter in law, with her, which returned out of the country of Moab: and they came to Bethlehem in the beginning of barley harvest.&#8221; (Ruth 1:22, KJV)<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n<p><strong>So Naomi returned.<\/strong> Not Mara. The writer of Ruth heard her ask for a new name, and in the very next breath called her by the old one.<\/p>\n\n<p>It keeps going. The word &#8220;Mara&#8221; shows up exactly once in the whole Book of Ruth, in the sentence where she asks for it. After that, the book calls her Naomi more than a dozen times, across every chapter, all the way to the last page. The narrator never uses the new name. Not once.<\/p>\n\n<p>That is not the narrator being rude. Look at what else is packed into verse 22, right after she says &#8220;the LORD hath brought me home again empty&#8221;:<\/p>\n\n<ul>\n<li><strong>&#8220;And Ruth &#8230; with her.&#8221;<\/strong> She says she came home empty, and the verse puts Ruth right next to her. The one person who would not leave her is standing there while she says she has nothing.<\/li>\n<li><strong>&#8220;In the beginning of barley harvest.&#8221;<\/strong> She left Bethlehem in a famine (Ruth 1:1). She comes back just as the fields are being gathered in. She calls herself empty at the exact moment the land starts to be full.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n<p>The writer does not argue with her. The writer just keeps telling the truth about what is around her, and keeps calling her by her real name.<\/p>\n\n<h2>&#8220;I Went Out Full&#8221; Is True, Too<\/h2>\n\n<p>Here is a detail most people read right past. Naomi says, &#8220;I went out full.&#8221; But Ruth 1:1 tells us she left during a famine. Those were not easy days.<\/p>\n\n<p>So was she wrong? Not really. She had her husband. She had her two sons. The famine was hard, but she walked out with her people. Looking back, <em>that<\/em> was full. It is how grief remembers: you do not miss the old season because it was easy. You miss it because the people were in it.<\/p>\n\n<p>That matters for anyone who feels bitter today. The Bible does not tell Naomi she was imagining her loss. She really did lose everything she named. Her bitterness was not a lie. It was a real wound. The only thing the book will not do is let the wound become her name.<\/p>\n\n<h2>A Root You Can&#8217;t See Yet<\/h2>\n\n<p>The New Testament has a well-known warning about bitterness, and it uses a picture from the ground:<\/p>\n\n<blockquote><p>&#8220;Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled.&#8221; (Hebrews 12:15, KJV)<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n<p>That phrase, &#8220;root of bitterness,&#8221; is borrowed. It comes from a warning Moses gave long before, about &#8220;a root that beareth gall and wormwood&#8221; (Deuteronomy 29:18). Gall and wormwood were the bitterest plants people knew. A root is the part of a plant that grows before you ever see anything above the soil.<\/p>\n\n<p>Three things stand out when you slow down on Hebrews 12:15:<\/p>\n\n<ul>\n<li><strong>It is written to a group, not one person.<\/strong> &#8220;Looking diligently lest any man fail.&#8221; It is people watching out for each other. Bitterness is not something you are supposed to spot and pull up all by yourself.<\/li>\n<li><strong>It starts with grace.<\/strong> The first worry is not &#8220;lest any man be bitter.&#8221; It is &#8220;lest any man fail of the grace of God.&#8221; Bitterness grows best in the place where someone has stopped expecting grace.<\/li>\n<li><strong>It spreads.<\/strong> &#8220;Many be defiled.&#8221; A root that stays in the ground long enough reaches into the soil around it. Bitterness rarely stays with just one person. It leaks into a family, a friendship, a church.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n<p>Paul says something similar in Ephesians 4:31: &#8220;Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice.&#8221; Then, right after, he tells us what to put in its place: &#8220;And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ&#8217;s sake hath forgiven you&#8221; (Ephesians 4:32). If you are wondering about the part of bitterness that is really an old grudge, we look at that more closely in <a href=\"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/bible-resources\/bible-answers\/is-it-a-sin-to-hold-a-grudge\/\">Is It a Sin to Hold a Grudge?<\/a><\/p>\n\n<h2>Honest Pain Is Not the Same as a Bitter Name<\/h2>\n\n<p>So here is the Turn, and it is gentler than most people expect.<\/p>\n\n<p>The Bible does not scold Naomi for saying she was bitter. It records her words in full. It even lets her say them about God, out loud, in public. Feeling the bitterness was not the problem.<\/p>\n\n<p>The danger is the thing Hebrews warns about: a root. Something that grows underground until it is no longer a feeling you have, but the name you answer to. &#8220;Call me Mara.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n<p>And the story&#8217;s answer to that is not a lecture. It is patience. The narrator simply keeps calling her Naomi until her life catches up with her real name.<\/p>\n\n<p>Watch how it happens. In chapter 2, when Ruth comes home with food from Boaz&#8217;s field, the woman who said &#8220;the Almighty hath afflicted me&#8221; says something new: &#8220;Blessed be he of the LORD, who hath not left off his kindness to the living and to the dead&#8221; (Ruth 2:20). By chapter 3, the woman who said she was empty is making plans for someone else: &#8220;My daughter, shall I not seek rest for thee, that it may be well with thee?&#8221; (Ruth 3:1).<\/p>\n\n<p>Then, in chapter 4, the same women of Bethlehem who heard her say &#8220;call me Mara&#8221; gather around her again. This time, holding her grandson, they say: &#8220;There is a son born to Naomi&#8221; (Ruth 4:17). They call her Naomi. And they call the baby &#8220;a restorer of thy life&#8221; (Ruth 4:15). That little boy, Obed, grows up to be the grandfather of King David. (We wrote more about Naomi holding that grandson in <a href=\"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/relationships-and-family\/grandparents-raising-grandchildren-bible\/\">Grandparents Raising Grandchildren: The Bible Has a Word for You<\/a>.)<\/p>\n\n<p>There is an old echo here too. Long before Naomi, Israel came to a spring called Marah, from the same word for bitter, where &#8220;they could not drink of the waters of Marah, for they were bitter&#8221; (Exodus 15:23). Moses cried out, and &#8220;the LORD shewed him a tree, which when he had cast into the waters, the waters were made sweet&#8221; (Exodus 15:25). The bitter place was real. It was not the end of the road.<\/p>\n\n<p>That is what the Bible says about bitterness. Your hurt is real, and you are allowed to say so, even to God, even out loud. But bitterness is a season, not a name. God keeps calling you by the one you had before the loss, and waits, with great patience, for your life to grow back into it.<\/p>\n\n<h2>Actions to Take Today<\/h2>\n\n<ol>\n<li><strong>Finish your sentence honestly.<\/strong> Write down the one line you keep saying about yourself since the hurt, like &#8220;I&#8217;m just not a trusting person anymore.&#8221; Then look at it and ask: is this a feeling I have, or a name I&#8217;ve started answering to?<\/li>\n<li><strong>Look for your &#8220;Ruth &#8230; with her.&#8221;<\/strong> Naomi said she came home empty with Ruth standing beside her. Name one person who has stayed near you through this. Send them a short message today, even just &#8220;Thank you for sticking with me.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li><strong>Take one small step toward letting go.<\/strong> If a specific person is at the root of it, you do not have to fix everything today. Try our free, private <a href=\"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/am-i-ready-to-forgive\/\">Am I Ready to Forgive?<\/a> check-in to see honestly where you are, with no pressure to be further along than you are.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n<h2>Journaling Prompts<\/h2>\n\n<ul>\n<li>If you had to give your hardest season a name, what would it be? What name did people call you before it?<\/li>\n<li>Where in your life right now is the &#8220;barley harvest&#8221; you might be walking past because you feel empty?<\/li>\n<li>Who in your life has kept calling you by your real name, even when you didn&#8217;t feel like that person?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n<h2>A Prayer for When You Feel Bitter<\/h2>\n\n<p><em>God, I&#8217;m not going to pretend. Some of what happened still tastes bitter, and part of me has started believing that&#8217;s just who I am now. Thank you that you let Naomi say it out loud, and that you didn&#8217;t turn away from her. Please don&#8217;t let this hurt grow roots in me or spill onto the people I love. Keep calling me by my real name until I can hear it again, and help me notice who you&#8217;ve kept standing beside me. Amen.<\/em><\/p>\n\n<h2>A Question for You<\/h2>\n\n<p>Why do you think the writer of Ruth never used the name Mara, even though Naomi asked for it? Was it kindness, stubbornness, or something else? Tell us what you think in the comments below.<\/p>\n\n<div class=\"convertkit-form wp-block-convertkit-form\" style=\"\"><script async data-uid=\"6491fb8269\" src=\"https:\/\/bgodinspired.kit.com\/6491fb8269\/index.js\" data-jetpack-boost=\"ignore\" data-no-defer=\"1\" data-no-optimize=\"1\" nowprocket><\/script><\/div>\n\n\n<h2>Share This<\/h2>\n\n<ul>\n<li>&#8220;Naomi told her whole town, &#8216;Call me Mara&#8217;, which means bitter. The very next verse calls her Naomi. The Book of Ruth never used the new name. Not once. I needed that today.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Bitterness is a season, not a name. I&#8217;m still learning that.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;I&#8217;ve been saying &#8216;I came home empty&#8217; about my own life for a while. Then I read Ruth 1:22 and noticed Ruth was standing right next to Naomi when she said it. Who&#8217;s standing next to you?&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n<h2>Questions People Ask About Bitterness in the Bible<\/h2>\n\n<h3>What does the Bible say about bitterness?<\/h3>\n<p>The Bible treats bitterness as real pain that should be spoken honestly, but not allowed to take root. In Ruth 1:20, the widow Naomi asks her town to call her Mara, meaning bitter, and her words are recorded without rebuke. Hebrews 12:15 warns against a &#8220;root of bitterness&#8221; that grows and troubles many people, and Ephesians 4:31-32 says to put bitterness away and replace it with kindness and forgiveness.<\/p>\n\n<h3>Why did Naomi change her name to Mara?<\/h3>\n<p>Naomi asked to be called Mara because her husband and both of her sons had died while the family lived in Moab. When she returned to Bethlehem, she told the townspeople in Ruth 1:20, &#8220;Call me not Naomi, call me Mara: for the Almighty hath dealt very bitterly with me.&#8221; Naomi means something like &#8220;pleasant,&#8221; and Mara means &#8220;bitter.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n<h3>Does the Bible ever call Naomi &#8220;Mara&#8221;?<\/h3>\n<p>No. The name Mara appears only once in the Book of Ruth, in Ruth 1:20, where Naomi asks for it. The very next verse, Ruth 1:22, begins &#8220;So Naomi returned,&#8221; and the book keeps calling her Naomi through the final chapter, where the women of Bethlehem say &#8220;There is a son born to Naomi&#8221; (Ruth 4:17).<\/p>\n\n<h3>What is the &#8220;root of bitterness&#8221; in Hebrews 12:15?<\/h3>\n<p>The &#8220;root of bitterness&#8221; in Hebrews 12:15 is a picture of resentment that grows unseen, like a root underground, until it troubles and defiles many people. The phrase echoes Deuteronomy 29:18, which warns of &#8220;a root that beareth gall and wormwood,&#8221; two of the bitterest plants known in the ancient world. Hebrews ties it to failing &#8220;of the grace of God&#8221; and addresses the warning to a whole community watching out for each other.<\/p>\n\n<h3>Is it a sin to feel bitter?<\/h3>\n<p>Feeling hurt is not the same as holding on to bitterness. In the Book of Ruth, Naomi says openly that she feels bitter, and the text records her words without condemning her. What scripture warns against, in Hebrews 12:15 and Ephesians 4:31, is letting bitterness take root, spread to others, and push out kindness and forgiveness.<\/p>        <div class=\"booster-block booster-reactions-block\">\n            <div class=\"twp-reactions-icons\">\n                \n                <div class=\"twp-reacts-wrap\">\n                    <a react-data=\"be-react-1\" post-id=\"116107\" class=\"be-face-icons un-reacted\" href=\"javascript:void(0)\">\n                        <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/booster-extension\/\/assets\/icon\/happy.svg\" alt=\"Happy\" title=\"\">\n                    <\/a>\n                    <div class=\"twp-reaction-title\">\n                        Happy                    <\/div>\n                    <div class=\"twp-count-percent\">\n                                                    <span style=\"display: none;\" class=\"twp-react-count\">0<\/span>\n                        \n         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Naomi told her town to call her Mara, Bitter. The very next verse calls her Naomi, and the book never stops.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":116106,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_wp_convertkit_post_meta":{"form":"-1","landing_page":"0","tag":"0","restrict_content":"0"},"footnotes":""},"categories":[669,3541,3543],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-116107","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-bible-answers","category-bible-characters","category-bible-themes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/116107","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=116107"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/116107\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":116108,"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/116107\/revisions\/116108"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/116106"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=116107"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=116107"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bgodinspired.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=116107"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}